An elementary school teacher decided to hand out candy and have the students guess what they are… The teacher explains to the class the game they will be playing; guessing the candy she gives them. The class roars in excitement. The teacher walks over to a student named Suzie and hands her a peppermint. The … Read more
At school Little Johnny’s class is learning about medicines. Sister Catherine, the teacher, asks the pupils what kind of medicines they know and what they are used for. The first pupil said: “Tylenol?” “Very good! And what is it used for?” “It is used for a headache.” The second pupil said: “Nytol.” “Excellent!” said Sister … Read more
Little Johnny was in class and the teacher announced that they were going to try something different to help everyone get to know each other a little better and to help with their spelling. She explained: “I want you to stand up and give us the occupation of your father, spell it, and say one … Read more
Little Johnny goes to talk to his professor about his grade. The Johnny comes up to the professor, “What is this, why did your grade mean 80?” The professor looks at the exam again, “Yep, an 80 is what you deserve” The Little Johnny takes the exam back and asks “If I’ll bite my own … Read more
A young boy says to his father “Dad, our maths teacher is asking to see you.” “What happened?” The father asks. “Well, she asked me, ‘how much is 7 * 9?’ I answered ’63’ , then she asked, ‘and 9 * 7?’ So I asked ‘what’s the fucking difference?’ “Indeed, what is the difference?” asks … Read more
A teacher shows three toys to a student and asks the student to find out the differences. All the three toys are seemed to be identical in their shape, size and material. After keen observation, the student observes holes in the toys. First toy has holes in the ears. Second toy has holes in ear … Read more
A kindergarten teacher one day is trying to explain to her class the definition of the word “definitely” to them. To make sure the students have a good understanding of the word, she asks them to use it in a sentence. The first student raised his hand and said “The sky is definitely blue”. The … Read more
A philosophy professor stood before his class with some items on the table in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with rocks, about 2 inches in diameter. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They … Read more
During one of Bankei’s classes, a pupil was caught stealing. All the disciples demanded he be expelled, but Bankei did nothing. The following week, the pupil stole again. The others, irritated, demanded that the thief be punished. “How wise you all are,” said Bankei. “You know what is right and wrong, and you can study … Read more
A schoolteacher used to take a short nap every afternoon. When his pupils asked him why he did so, he said that he went to dreamland to meet ancient sages. One extremely hot day some of the pupils fell asleep in the afternoon. When the school-teacher chided them, they said: “We went to meet the … Read more
The teacher asked the class to use the word “fascinate” in a sentence. Molly put up her hand and said, “My family went to my granddad’s farm, and we all saw his pet sheep It was fascinating.” The teacher said, “That was good, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate,’ not ‘fascinating’.” Sally … Read more
Little Johnny is constantly late for school and what’s worse is that he always has a big lie explaining why. The teacher tells the principal that she has had it with his exaggerations. The principal tells her to send Johnny to him the next time he shows up late. He will tell Johnny a lie … Read more